Invisible
by breathing-for-this-moment
Summary: And you just see right through me, but if you only knew me, we could be a beautiful, wonderful, unbelievable, instead of just invisble... Patricia has a secret that she needs to set free. Not a couple I would usually write about, but give it a chance!
1. Chapter 1

**Authors Note: I know, a lot of you are waiting for part 3 of Innocent. Its coming, I promise! But I got kind of stuck, and to remove my writers block I decided to challenge myself by writing something completely different from what I would normally write. So, I wrote a Patrome fic. Even though I'm a Jara and Peddie shipper, it was kind of fun to imagine what it would be like for Patricia to like Jerome. I tried my best to make it believable, so give the story a chance and let me know if I did my job :D**

Invisible

_She can't see the way your eyes,  
Will light up when you smile.  
She'll never notice how you stop and stare,  
Whenever she walks by._

As I feel those all too familiar butterflies flit around my stomach, I wonder when my life got so complicated. I never used to be _that girl. _That girl who got all squealy with even a look from the object of her affections. That girl who could live off a single smile for days and could float on a conversation for weeks. No, I despised those types of girls. I hated them almost as much as I hated the fact that, recently, whenever I looked at Jerome Clarke I never wanted to look away.

So how on Earth had I become _that girl_? I was the _opposite_ of those girls. Strong and independent, I was the first to speak my mind and the last to follow orders. So how had I allowed myself to become so dependent on one boy? On Jerome Clarke, for God's sake, a boy who, at least until recently, I had been positive that I hated with every fiber of my being. He was a slimeball, after all. My favorite enemy and most hated friend, because he was Jerome and I was Patricia and thats just always how I thought it would be.

It was his eyes, I decided, as I swirled soggy cheerios around my bowl with a spoon and tried to keep it from being too obvious that I was staring. His pale blue eyes, cold and calculating and as unforgiving as the iceberg that sunk the Titanic. They were my downfall. They pulled me in and refused to let me go. And when he smiled, oh, when he smiled, those eyes lit up. They sparkled and shone with that mischevious glint that I just _loved_ and I wondered how anyone could ever want to look at anything else.

Sometimes, I think that it wouldn't be so bad, loving Jerome Clarke. After all, he was funny, and intelligent, and, though he'd never let anyone know, vulnerable. He was the damanged boy that I had always dreamed of fixing. And even though we were supposed to hate each other, everyone in Anubis House knew that beyond both of our tough exteriors we cared about each other more than we would ever admit. More and more recently, though, I just can't shake this sudden urge to grab him and kiss him senseless. To wipe away any pain that anyone had caused him in the past, to hold him and love him and never let him go.

God, when did I become such a hopeless romantic?

There was only one problem, a problem that came in the form of bouncing and bubbling Mara Jaffray. Pretty, smart, class president Mara who, without even trying, somehow managed to be better than me in just about everything. So it didn't surprise me, really, it didn't, when Jerome decided to fall in love not with me (like he should), but with perfect little Mara Jaffray (like he was expected to).

Too bad Mara was completely smitten with her boyfriend, Mick Campbell. In fact, they were entering the common room now, their intertwined hands swinging back and forth. He leans down and whispers something into her ear, and she lets out a loud, happy laugh that fills the room like a ray of sunshine. Mara doesn't notice the way Jerome's features tighten in annoyance, the way his fingers grip the edge of his chair so tightly that his knuckles turn white. To be fair, she doesn't notice much of anything, anymore. She's too wrapped up in her perfect little Mick world. But I notice, I notice everything about him. And I wish desperately that I could make Jerome as happy as Mick makes Mara. But I can't. I can't because the only thing that could ever make Jerome as shining and happy as Mara is now is the same person who is causing him all of his pain.

_And you can't see me wanting you the way you want her,  
But you are everything to me._

As I watch this scene unfold before me, I wait for it to come. As I watch Mick and Mara share a sweet, tender kiss right smack in the middle of the living room, as I watch Jerome turn away, watch his beautiful eyes dim, all hope draining out of them, I wait for that petty, vindictive sense of satisfaction that in the end, Jerome ends up just as miserable as I am. But it never arrives.

And I nearly chokes on my bite of cerial when I realize that his pain, instead of making me happy, just fills me up with this sense of mourning. His pain is my pain, and all I really want is for him to be happy. Even if he can only find that hapiness with Mara.

**How could I have let this happen to myself?**

He runs a hand through his already messy hair and I have trouble believing that one human being could be that flawless. Honestly, for a genius, Mara was being awfully stupid if she thought that passing up someone like Jerome for someone like Mick was a good idea.

And though I wonder how I could let myself be so entirely consumed by one person, I know its futile to resist. Somehow, without even trying, Jerome has managed to crack through my tough outer shell and expose the vulnerable girl beneath. No matter how much I wish it wasn't true, every wish I ever make is for him.

_And I just want to show you,  
She don't even know you.  
She's never gonna love you like I want to._

How could he be so stupid? Mara doesn't know him. She doesn't know his fears, his hopes, his dreams. Not like I do. I can't even count the number of times we have snuck out after curfew, laying on a blanket under the stars and discussing anything and everything. Though I would never admit it to anyone, I really do miss those days. When it was just me and Jerome against the world. This year, Joy disappeared and everything with Rufus and Victor happened. I got caught up with Sibuna and Jerome got tangled up with Mara, and suddenly its like we live on seperate planets.

But that doesn't mean that I have forgotten those conversations we had so long ago. No, I remember every word, every brushing of fingertips, every electric spark, even if I was the only one to feel them. I _know_ Jerome Clarke, so why can't he see that? Mara wouldn't know how to love him if he threw himself at her feet, but I would never hurt him. (I know he's suffered from too much pain already).

_You just see right through me,  
But if you only knew me,  
We could be a beautiful, miracle, unbelievable,  
Instead of just invisible._

"You should just talk to him, you know. Tell him how you feel." I'm so busy watching Jerome that Nina's voice shocks me, causing me to jump about 10 feet out of my seat.

"_Nina!_ You scared me! How about a little warning next time!" I snap at her, but I'm blushing and blustering at her comment. "Besides, I don't know what you're talking about." I wasn't staring at Jerome or anything like that. _Haha, silly Nina..._

She rolls her eyes. "Patricia, it is so obvious that you love Jerome that Amber and I are literally planning ways to shove your faces together."

"You're one to talk! Do I even need to tell you how many opportunties you had to get with Fabian before you finally took one? And even then, _he_ had to ask _you_. Besides, I have zero feelings for Jerome. Zip, nada, none."

"Look, I know I'm probably the last person you would listen to about this stuff." She says, ignoring the second part of my statement. "But I'm speaking from experience. Fabian...he completes me. And however corny that sounds, now that he's in my life I can't imagine how it would be without him. I'm so glad that he took a risk and asked me to the dance. And Jerome... maybe Jerome is your Fabian. Don't let him get away. Trust me, I know it's hard to put your feelings out there, because you never know if the person you like is going to like you back. But sometimes you just have to take that risk, because you never know what might happen."

Its funny, because about two months ago I would slap Nina for making a cheesy speech like that. Who would've thought that this girl who I hated would end up one of my best friends? And her and Fabian do look super happy together. They were inseperable before, but now its as if it causes each of them physical, tangible pain to be apart. And just as I'm about to ask Nina where her other half is, in he walks, two magnets being pulled towards each other.

Fabian leans over the back of her chair, wrapping his arms around her waist and planting a kiss on her cheek. "Hey, cuteness. You ready to head into town?"

She smiles a brilliant smile while I pretend to vomit. He looks at me and smirks. "Good morning to you too, Patricia."

"Get out of here, lovebirds. You make me want to throw up rainbows." They laugh and Nina stands up, grabbing her bag in one hand and interlocking her other hand with Fabian's. They leave, but not before she shoots me a pointed look.

"Just think about it."

And then there were two. Mara and Mick have left, too, and Alfie and Amber are who knows where. I stare intently into my bowl, glancing up occassionally through my eyelashes. Sending out telepathic vibes, _talk to me talk to me talk to me_, as if Jerome's brain might somehow pick them up and answer my prayers. But he doesn't. Silence rings through the room, and a few minutes after Mick and Mara exit, Jerome stands up and leaves, too.

Like I'm not even there. Before Mara came into the picture, Jerome wouldn't hesitate to speak to me, even if his words came in the form of a teasing, taunting remark. His insults used to make my blood boil, but now I would give anything to hear him call me "Trixie".

Funny how things change. Now, Jerome is as consumed with Mara as Mara is with Mick. Its like she is all he can see, all he can hear, all he can think about. Everyone else is as insignificant as a fly. To him, we are invisible.

_There's a fire inside of you,  
That can't help but shine through.  
She's never gonna see the light,  
No matter what you do._

Angrily, I shove back my chair and stand up, grabbing my bowl of cereal to place in the sink. The chair emits a harsh screech as wood scrapes on wood, and in the silence of the empty room it fills the air like a small nuclear explosion.

Maybe Nina is right. Maybe I should go talk to him. After all, he'll never know how I feel if I don't say anything. But then again, what will telling him how I feel accomplish? I already know what his answer will be. He's in love with someone, but it isn't me.

It's just... it kills me inside. To watch him fade away. Jerome is brilliant, he's the sun. No matter what anyone else thinks, I will always look at him and see the good. No matter how many layers of hurt and resentment I have to dig through, I can always find his core. And his soul shines brighter than anything I have ever seen.

But Mara, she doesn't notice. She can't tell that there's a fire inside of him, a spark. And every time she ignores him, because she's just so damn _ignorant_ and howcouldshenotnoticehisbeauty?, his light, that wonderful light, fades a bit.

Soon, I'm afraid there won't be any left.

And just then, like when the clouds move away from the sun and suddenly everything is clear, I come to a conclusion. Realization hits me like a bolt of lightning.

I cannot let that happen. _Jerome's fire cannot die_.

So I go to find him. Because, honestly? I've got nothing left to lose.

**So, what did you think? Was my first attempt at a Patrome fic a success or a miserable fail? Let me know!**

**Stay tuned, part 2 coming soon (:  
-Moments**


	2. Chapter 2

**Authors note: Hello readers! Here I am with part two of Invisible. I'd just like to give a quick thanks to everyone who favorited and/or reviewed chapter 1. You guys have no idea how much those reviews mean to me.**

**Anyway, I hope you enjoy! Part three coming soon.**

_Like shadows in a faded light,  
Oh, we're invisible.  
I just wanna open your eyes  
And make you realize..._

I find him in his room. Jerome is slouching on his bed, back resting against the headboard. He's listening to his iPod, and his eyes are closed, and he's got this peaceful look on his face like he's comletely in his own little world. Its kind of cute, and I almost don't want to disturb him.

Almost. I slam the door shut so he'll notice me.

His eyes fly open as he yanks out his earbuds. "Patricia!" He sounds so surprised to see me, and I'm hit with the ridiculousness of it, all of a sudden. Of how stupid it is for me to be standing here, in his room, about to pour my heart out. I'm about to pour my heart out to _Jerome Clarke_. God, what is wrong with me?

I open my mouth to speak, but just stand there gaping like an idiot when my mind decides to go completely blank. Seriously, I am standing there, in Jerome's room, and I cannot think of one single thing to say. What was I thinking, coming in here? What, did I think I could just walk in, state my feelings, and then Jerome would drop to his knees with a passionate proclomation of love? No, of course that wouldn't happen. He would probably laugh in my face, because he can be a jerk like that. I knew that, coming in. But I did it anyway, because for some unfathomable reason I'm in love with him, jerkiness and all.

Then again, nothing would ever happen if I couldn't find within myself the will to speak. Silence stretches between us, and I take a moment to just appreciate him. His hair, dirty blonde and artfully messed up, his eyes, as piercing and blue as always, and his smirk, that mischevious smirk that makes me melt into a puddle.

He clears his throat uncomfortably. "Um, Patricia...what are you doing in my room?" _Trixie_, I think, _You're supposed to call me Trixie..._

"You're a complete dumbass, you know." For a second, I want to praise the lord that I finally said _something_. Then I realize what I said, and I want to crawl in a hole and die. This was so not going as planned.

Jerome just looks confused. "You came all the way into my room just to tell me that?" He rolls his eyes towards the heavens, as if asking for strength. "Ok, if you're just going to insult me, then I'd much rather listen to music, thanks." And just like that, he places his earbuds back in and shuts his eyelids.

And now I'm angry. Ok, so maybe calling him a dumbass wasn't the best way to go. But that doesn't give him permission to ignore me! And once the words are out, I can't take them back. I decide to just roll with it.

I stomp over to his bed and yank the earbuds right out of his ears.

"Ow!" He cries, shooting up from his slouching position and massaging his earlobes. "Have you gone insane?"

Probably. "What I said is completely true, Jerome. There you go, pining away after Mara, who will never love you, by the way, and completely shutting out anyone else who could possibly care about you. There are people in this universe other then Mara Jaffray, but you just stare right through everyone who doesn't have her perfect little smile, or perfect little laugh. Its like we're invisible. It's pathetic, quite frankly. And I'm sick of it."

He gives a little shake of his head, like he just can't believe any of this is actually happening. For a second, just for a second, I see a flash of something in his eyes. Resignation, sadness, love? I'm not sure, but it's enough to make me hope that maybe I had finally gotten through to him. Before I can even comprehend it, though, the look is gone, replaced with the cold, calculating poker face that he usually wears.

"Who are you, to come in here and call me a dumbass, and pathetic? You're pathetic, Patricia, and clearly delusional if you think for one second that I am shutting out anyone who could care about me. No one cares about me, not my parents, not Sibuna, not Mara or Mick. No one. You've all made that perfectly clear."

I care about you. "Alfie cares about you."

He scoffs. "Hardly. Not since your stupid little Sibuna gang managed to trap him. I barely see him anymore. And I'm fine with that. I've made it this far without anyone, haven't I?"

"Maybe, but you're not living, Jerome. You're empty. Everyone has someone. Even you, if you'd take a minute to get past that thick head of yours."

"Oh spare me, Trixie. You aren't my therapist. Please, then, if you would be so kind, do tell. Who does care about me? Because they've been hiding it awfully well."

He called me Trixie again. Progress. I muster up all my courage. "Me, Jerome. I care about you."

He stares at me for a second, and I stare right back. His gaze penetrates right to my soul, makes it hard to breathe. And then, he bursts out laughing.

He laughs. Right in my face. "You? Oh, good one, Trixie! Wait 'til Alfie gets a load of that! You, actually caring about me? That's absurd!" He wipes away tears from under his eyes, a giant, ruthless grin cracking across his face.

How did I ever fall for this kid? I try not to let him see how much his laughter hurts me. "You're such a jerk!" I explode. I'm yelling now, if anyone else is in the house they can probably hear me. But I can't find it within myself even the desire to care anymore. Let people think what they want. Let Jerome think what he wants. It doesn't even matter anymore. "Of course I care about you, Jerome! I freaking love you! I've been in love with you since last year! And I don't care that you're heartless, or that you think you're rotten or a bad person. I don't care that you think you aren't kind. Because, honestly? Everything you think about yourself is true! You are malicious and manipulative. You don't care about anyone's feelings but your own. You are an empty shell of a person, Jerome Clarke, yet for some insane reason, I love you anyway."

I take a breath and try to calm myself. But now that the words have started flowing, I can't stop them. I've been hiding these feelings for so long, its a relief to finally get them off my chest. "But you know what? I also see so much light in you. So much good. I know you care about people, I know it. I just think that you've shut everyone out for so long, you've forgotten what its like to be loved. I know your parents don't care about you, but its their loss. _I care about you_. And if you would just take your head out of your ass, maybe you would realize that."

_And I just wanna show you,  
She don't even know you ,  
Baby let me love you let me want you..._

I finish, breathing heavily. Did I really just say all that? Well, never doubt the insanity of Patricia Williamson in love. Silence stretches between us. I try to read Jerome's emotions, but there aren't any there. His face is absolutely blank. In fact, he looks almost...bored.

But I know better. Jerome hides his feelings, that much is obvious. "Well, are you going to say something, or are you going to just stare at me like an idiot?" I demand.

His eyes, as usual, give him away and steal my breath. His countenance may be blank, but his eyes sparkle with a mix of emotions that I can't even begin to decipher. "Oh, so you're done then?" He drawls. And I want to punch him. Seriously, I do. But I restrain myself, because that would really undermine that huge speech I had just given him.

_Do not cry_. I command myself. This was expected. "Stop." I cut him off. "Just stop. You know what? Forget it. Forget I ever even came in here. Just continue along in your blind little Mara world, completely miserable, and forget that I ever mentioned that I was in love with you." And I try to keep my voice steady but for some reason it breaks and I'm getting choked up and _do not cry_.

All of a sudden, his features soften. "Patricia..." His voice is soft, filled with an unreadable emotion. Pain? Regret? Honestly, I'm just too tired to figure it out. He reaches out, as if to grab me, and for a second I think he might. I actually think he might grab me by the waist and pull me close and love me the way I want to love him.

But of course he doesn't. My fantasy shatters when he retracts his hand as if he's been electrocuted. As if the thought of touching me disgusts him. "Patricia, I'm sorry. I just..."

"You just love Mara." I finish the statement for him. "I know." There's a waterfall building up behind my eyes, threatening to spill over any second. I have to get out of there. Because I will not, I must not, give Jerome the satisfaction of seeing me cry. "I...I have to go. See you later, Slimeball." And I hate how broken my voice sounds.

I turn and flee. Behind me, I hear him call out "Trixie, wait!" But I don't stop. The tears are falling now, faster and faster, running down my face in black mascara smudges. And as I slam the door behind me, I think I maybe hear him crying, too.

But that's impossible. Jerome Clarke does not cry. Then again, before today I was sure that Patricia Williamson didn't cry, either.

**Well, there you guys have it! Chapter two. Lots of drama, I know, but that was just to get you ready for chapter three (: Loved it, hated it, you know what to do. Review! Every comment is apreciated.**

**-Moments**


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